Marriages of Women in China

An old China (1912-1949) is a period when it was quite inferior for women to live. According to Feminist Criticism, women were traditionally bound to marriage. In China, women were mainly used as reproductive machines. Most cases in that time were a woman were tightly caught in her marriage by the pressure to produce a son and treated without any respects by their husbands. Such phenomenon is fully expressed in the novel The Joy Luck Club. Nevertheless, over approximately 70 years, those conventional doctrines still influence some people living in the early 21st century and we can see that from the play Chinglish. Therefore, no matter living in the nineteen century or earlier in the twenty-first century, it seems that the marriage of women was always under the pressure of producing sons, getting rid of a marriage where they feel marginalized was synonymous with death, which is reflected in the characters of Xi in Chinglish and the traditional Chinese mothers in The Joy Luck Club.

In the novel The Joy Luck Club, An Mei’s mother is a typical example of those women who have a sorrowful life and never escape from their suffering marriages until they die. She was forbidden to see her daughter because she broke the prescribed manners for a widow. She was tricked by Wu Tsing and became his fourth wife. In Wo Tsing’s house, her only son was taken by the second wife of Wo Tsing and she had to share her husband with other four women. In the chapter Magpies in The Joy Luck Club, An Mei describes:

"I was raised the Chinese way: I was taught to desire nothing, to swallow other people’s misery to eat my own bitterness."

There is no doubt that her mother was also influenced by and educated in a traditional Chinese way and generated profound impacts on An-Mei that a girl has to keep quiet and could only listen and watch - just like what An-Mei said in Magpies: “How could she leave without me? This was a question I could not ask”. An-Mei’s mother chose to be silent even she was the victim. She was misunderstood by her family members, was sent away to be the fourth wife of her husband and even lost her son at the end. However, she never tried to fight for herself when she was cursed by her family members. Ultimately, An-Mei’s mother could only choose to die to release herself and kill her weak spirit in order to give her daughter a stronger one. Such behavior also influenced An-Mei. When An-Mei first met her mother in her uncle’s house after they were separated for 5 years, she never felt her mother evil and she even wanted to touch her mother’s face, however, she could not do it. She could never express her perceptions to her own mother and she could not get close to her mother or touch mother’s face as she wished because of the fusty Chinese doctrine that if you are born as a girl, you have to keep quiet and could only listen and watch, living your life as if you were in dream, was rooted deeper in An-Mei’s mind. Over 70 years later, in Chinglish, Xi Yan is a 40-year-old female and the Vice Minister of Culture in Guiyang. Although she studied abroad, she still thinks in a traditional Chinese way. David Henry Hwang (2011), the writer of the play points out that “many ways Xi Yan looked at the world were still culturally Chinese, especially, in the aspect of her marriage.” Here is a conversation between Xi and Daniel from Scene 11 in Chinglish:

Xi: End marriage, easy. Escape, hard.

…

Xi: The long marriage. Like work, work, work. Then escape. No escape, only working is, um, death. Marriage, same. Also, death. Unless, escape. But. not so easy. In Guiyang, so much people, they know me.

When Daniel tried to tell his wife about the relationship between Xi and him, Xi stopped him immediately. Just as what she said above, she believes that only when a woman dies, she can escape from her marriage completely.

Gradually, women were always being trapped in a marriage because they were never being respected in a patriarchal society where they were only treated as a reproduction machine. Life was a torment to most of the Chinese women in the 19th century. In The Joy Luck Club, Lindo’s mother betrothed Lindo to the son of Huang Taitai when she was only two years old. Unfortunately, she found her marriage became the source of her painful life. When she first came to Huang Taitai’s house, she was only twelve. In the chapter The Red Candle she describes:

"No big celebration was held when I arrived. Huang Taitai didn’t have red banners greeting me in the fancy room on the first floor. Tyan-yu was not there to greet me. Instead, Huang Taitai hurried me upstairs to the second floor and in to the kitchen, which was a place where family children didn’t usually go. This was a place for cooks and servants."

According to this paragraph, it is not difficult to see the position of Lindo in Huang Taitai’s house. It seems that Lindo was bought by Huang as a servant rather than a wife that married to Tian-yu. Even Lindo was looked down by Huang, she still tried her best to be a good wife and her efforts successfully made Huang happy until Lindo failed to give her a grandson. Then, the worst time came when Huang Taitai forced Lindo to lie on bad until she was pregnant successfully:

"She (Huang Taitai) said I must concentrate and think of nothing but having babies. And four times a day, a very nice servant girl would come into my room, apologizing the whole rime while making me drink a terrible-tasting medicine."

She was treated as a tool with the function of reproduction rather than a human with rights. She was not trapped by her bad but by her marriage. She has to finish her duty of reproduction so that she can be treated as “a valuable wife” by Huang Taitai.In Chinglish, although, Xi Yan was an excellent businesswoman, Xi was also trapped by her marriage. She would rather maintain her loveless marriage by Qingyi than having a new life with Daniel, just as what she said to Daniel “Qingyi is like comrade and committing”. Based on the traditional value in China, following her heart to have a new life with Daniel will ruin everything in her life. In this case, she could only choose to have an affair with him secretly.

Furthermore, it is easy to find that romance was not the key to run a marriage since they were trapped by the traditional duty-reproduction and obedience for a long time. In the chapter, “Waiting Between the Tree” in The Joy Luck Club, Ying Ying was married with a man who loved her very much. However, she realized that the man she married was so terrible. She confessed to her daughter that:

" I will tell her (Lena) of the baby I killed because I came to hate this man (her first husband) so much… I took this baby from my womb before it could be born… I thought it was bad, because my body flowed with terrible revenge as the juices of this man’s firstborn son poured from me."

When she realized there was no more romance or love between her and her husband, she still chose to stay with him and even used her son to take revenge rather than just giving up this unhappy marriage. While in Chinglish, Xi Yan said:

Xi: The romance was for me.

Just me…

I, perfection. Cannot. Try, but cannot. So hard the attempting, yet still-home, family, silence-the death never ending. And so, therefore, cannot. Yet good, enough good, to be wife, can.

Xi admitted that she loves Daniel and there is no love between her and her husband. Even though she pursues her romance by having sex with Daniel, she still cannot get a divorce with her husband as she thinks family, home, peaceful life and reputation are much more important than romance.

In conclusion, through the comparison of the characteristics in Chinglish a play and The Joy Luck Club, marriages of women in China are more like a trap. It is hard for women to enjoy a romantic relationship in their marriages under the pressure and even the duty of reproduction.

References:

Bloom, H. (2009). Amy Tan. New York, NY: Bloom's Literary Criticism.

David Henry Hwang’s ‘Chinglish’ - The New York Times. (n.d.). Retrieved October 21, 2016, from http://www.nytimes.com/2011/10/23/theater/david-henry-hwangs-chinglish.html

Hwang, D. H., Chong, C. M., & Lee, J. C. (2012). Chinglish: A play. New York: Theatre Communications Group.

Tan, A. (1989). The Joy Luck Club. New York: Putnam's.

Wiener, G. (2008). Women's issues in Amy Tan's The Joy Luck Club. Detroit: Greenhaven Press.